Let’s face it. Some folks just don’t understand CONSENT, what it is, what it means. This is a great clip to explain consent and everybody needs to get it! Click here to read the article.
Seven Signs
Watching porn certainly does not indicate one has a problem with porn or sex addiction. An infidelity does not indicate sex addiction. How can you identify a problem or this much misunderstood addiction? This is a very direct, down to earth article about the signs and symptoms you might want to see a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist (CSAT) about.
http://www.thefix.com/content/7-signs-you%E2%80%99re-dating-sex-addict70002
In Crisis…What Now?
I often see the betrayed spouses of sex addicts. They make an appointment and come in in crisis having just found out about their husbands infidelity via seeing a text on their phone, walking in to find him looking at porn, or becoming aware about an affair. They are confused, angry, hurt, in shock, and have no idea what to do. This is particularly traumatic when they are truly in love and surprisingly find out that the one person they assume has their back, is lying and leading a double life.
What should I do? What do I tell the kids? Is this for real?
Please, wake me when this is over!
The betrayed spouse may well be dealing with a sex addiction or a form of infidelity. With the marriage being threatened, the troubled spouse may comply and come in for help. There is much that can be done to help with porn addiction, cyber sex addiction, multiple lifetime affairs etc. Thanks to the renowned Patrick Carnes, Ph.D. and his work in the area of sex addiction since the 1980’s, we now know what it is and how to treat it. He has developed a task-based model. CSATs (Certified Sex Addiction Therapist) have studied his model and become competent with this standard of care. We know it has worked extremely well for people struggling in these areas. Also, we know, the traumatized partner deserves a chance to heal from all she has been through with her mate. CSATs are trained to work with the partner as well. Whether she stays or goes, she needs a chance to process what she has experienced so that she may understand and move forward with a healthier insight of herself and the spouse in the future.
I have had patients in recovery refer to the worst thing in their life, turning out to be the best thing in their life. Basically saying, had they not gone into therapy with the crisis, they would not have had the chance to enter recovery and learn so much about themselves. This new found insight turns out to be conducive to a happier, healthier lifetime. Many couples do make it through the storm, stronger and closer. Do not suffer in silence. There is help for you.
Yes this is a REAL ad on Television
Cybersex Explosion
Did you know…………?
The interactive features and availability online can be addictive. Because of the widespread availability of sexually explicit materials online, Internet sex addiction is the most common form of online behavior among users.” (Young, Caught in the Net)
Frequently Sexual addictions are rooted in trauma, or abuse, but, curiosity and exposure to sexually explicit materials online is enough to fuel an addiction. Whether use is due to curiosity or unresolved issues, the result has unlimited possibilities online.
Cybersex Explosion
We are experiencing a Cybersex Explosion of tsunami proportions. Cybersex is considered the “crack cocaine” of sex addiction.
Some interesting facts:
20% of Internet users engage in online sex addiction behavior.
40 Million Americans visit porn sites one time a month (Internet filter review site, Maltz)
One third of all downloads per month and one fourth of all searches per day are from porn.
25% in the US are accessing porn at work (2008 Nielson online survey).
70% of men reported increased use of porn since the Internet (Mens’ Health, 2004).
70% of men keep their porn use a secret and 8 – 15% report compulsive sexual behavior (MSNBC, 2000).
The average age for the first contact with Internet porn is about 11 years of age.
The 12-17 year old age group is the largest consumer of Internet porn.
The average age for seeking help with Cybersex Issues is between 30 and 35 years of age.
The gender prevalence of men versus women with Cybersex issues is 60% – 40% respectively.
80% of married sex addicts thought marriage was the answer to their addiction.
The National Council on Sexual Addiction Compulsivity estimated that six to eight percent of Americans are sex addicts, which is 16 to 21.5 million people.
71% of those people with sexual-acting-out problems also use the Internet as a venue.
70% of the Internet porn traffic occurs during the 9 a.m. – 5 p.m. workday.
Cybersex is extremely addictive because of the virtual anonymity and availability.
Cybersex addiction escalates extremely rapidly.